JUSTIN LANGER: Patrick Mahomes’ Super Bowl loss, Sam Mitchell’s AFL grand final loss highlight sporting lows

Lessons come from what you read, what you do, who you meet.

The challenge of this weekly column is to find a topic that may interest you as a reader.

Some weeks this is a serious test. Other weeks it seems to come easily. But a question that regularly heads my way is: “How do you do it? How do you decide what to write about?”

Frankly, I’m not sure how my brain works. But, thankfully, something enters my mind and I love the creativity of putting the words to the thought, similar to the title of Willie Nelson’s song, Energy Follows Thought.

And as for this week, multiple lessons have come my way, five of which I’ve learnt from and, hopefully, they may strike a chord with you.

We’re all different, and it’s great

I was in India for a training camp last week for the Lucknow Super Giants in the Indian Premier League.

There, I was reminded of the beauty of individualism. Meeting some of the young Indian players — most for the first time — I communicated with several of them through one of our Indian coaches who helped translate the players’ responses. Learning to communicate through a different means was cool — but it was two conversations that made me smile.

Akash Deep played for India this summer in the Test series. He’s a very good bowler, but hardly speaks a word of English.

When I asked him what his favourite part of Australia, was, he told me, “Sydney”.

When I quizzed him about why Perth wasn’t, he smiled and said in Hindi: “Perth is beautiful and very peaceful and quiet. But quiet isn’t peace to me. I need people and the noise lots of people bring with it. In Perth there are no people, no beeping horns, no white noise. I need these to find peace.”

One of his teammates, chimed in: “Australia is too quiet as a whole country. There is no noise, and I can’t sleep properly without the comfort of the noise.”

You either win or you learn as they say.

Isn’t it brilliant how everyone in this world is unique with different tastes, personalities and ambitions?

Keep your eyes on the challenge

Arriving home from India on Sunday night, the ocean was calling. Early morning dips can be like medicine for your mind and body. If nothing else, it is just a great way to start the day.

On Monday morning, I was walking in the cold, white sand. Bliss.

A minute or so later, I was ploughing through the shore break. The seas were choppy, and the waves were consistently rolling in. After a few minutes in nature’s bath, the sandy shore beckoned. Swimming back in, I stood up to see the café where my coffee was waiting. Bliss again.

Then, bang! Schoolboy error.

A wave smashed me from behind and for the first time in decades I was dumped. Like being in a washing machine, my body was being flung around like a leaf in a tornado. I was totally out of control, and for a second it was scary, especially when my hip, and then neck, crashed into the sand.

Laughing now about my stupidity, I was reminded about the power of nature and the importance of keeping your eyes on the waves in front of you.

Like in life, it is easier to confront things front on, than turn away and hope for the best. Getting dumped this week was not only a kick in my ego’s guts, but it was a great reminder of this.

You win or you learn

Much to the shock of some of my friends, I know very little about America’s favourite sport but it was a line in commentary while watching the Super Bowl being played in New Orleans on Monday that caught my attention.

Tom Brady widely considered the greatest NFL quarterback of all time, was commenting on Kansas Chiefs’ superstar Patrick Mahomes. Although Mahomes became the highest-paid player in NFL history in 2020 and has led the Chiefs to three Super Bowl victories, including 2023, and 2024, he wasn’t having a great game.

Focussing on this, and knowing the Chiefs were on the verge of defeat, Brady, a player with an extraordinary record of seven Super Bowl Championship wins and three losses, said: “There is no doubt in my mind that you remember the losses a lot more than you do the wins.”

My mate sitting next to me, asked: “Do you think that is true?”

Pondering for a moment, I replied: “Yes, maybe I do.”

When I think back on my career I often remember losing to India in 2001, a series we had at our fingertips, and then the 2005 Ashes in England. I still shake my head in wonder at that loss.

You either win or you learn as they say.

This reminded me of an interview I read in The Sunday Times with Hawthorn premiership player and captain, Sam Mitchell.

When asked if there was a single moment he remembered most about his illustrious career (Mitchell won a Brownlow Medal and played in four premiership-winning teams) he gave an extraordinary answer.

“You want to know what comes to mind?” he replied. “Marty Mattner stepping me in the 2012 grand final. Yep. He was a left-footer, and we were in the middle of the ground, so I thought he was going to run that way.

“Their goals are here — and so I moved to here and he ran around me like that. He kicked it long and they kicked a goal. And we ended up losing the grand final to Sydney. That’s all I could think of. That’s the first thing that came into my head. Is that bad?”

It’s funny how the mind works, how we often focus on the negatives. This has always intrigued me.

On the one hand, the losses or failures can keep us thinking about what me may have done differently, while on the other hand, we talk fondly about celebrating the good times with our family and friends.

This arm wrestle simply reminds me that both success and failure are important, as long as you are still in the game.

Draw on your experience in your darkest times

During the week I read this lovely story that made so much sense to me.

“A young man once said to a wise mentor: ‘I just don’t know how I am going to get through this terrible period of my life’. His mentor abruptly said to him: ‘It is now that everything you have been given in your life matters; this is what you draw on. Your parents, your friends, your work, your books, everything you have ever been told, everything you have ever learned, this is when you use that’.

“And the mentor was right. What is the point of all you have learned if you can’t employ it when you are floundering in a nadir? Haven’t all those lessons and loves been pooled in a reservoir you can draw on?”

The question of getting through the dark periods was put to me this week during a presentation to a crew of people from Western Australian Return Recycle Renew. In a nutshell my reply was: “Sometimes when you’re in a dark place, you think you have been buried, when actually you’ve been planted.”

Team work is powerful and rewarding

Michael Bevan, not the cricketer, but a friend who is visiting from the UK, overcame a personal challenge. At 35 years of age, Michael is as fit as any athlete I’ve known. And as an airline pilot, he’s a bloke who’s used to a bit of stress and pressure.

At home we have an ice bath that we use for recovery, health or just pure madness. In retirement, I used to laugh that I quit cricket so I never had to have an ice bath, do a beep test or 2km time trial ever again. Now I have an ice bath most days. Go figure.

Being a health fanatic, Michael was keen to have a crack at the ice bath in the backyard. For the first few days, he simply couldn’t do it. At one point he stood staring at the bath for five minutes or so, before gutsing it out for 10 seconds. It was “the worst pain ever” he reckoned.

After a couple of days of pulling the pin on his quest, we offered him some assistance in the form of encouragement, example and guidance. Step one, Gracie my youngest daughter, lowered herself into the bath and sat in it for five minutes. Michael just shook his head in disbelief. Then my daughter Sophie’s boyfriend Richie went next. After 15 minutes of pain, he jumped out with a smile on his face.

“Are you next or am I, mate?”.

Feeling the confidence — or under enormous peer group pressure — Michael, put up his hand and in he went.

“Breathe mate,” I said. “In for five through your nose, hold for seven, and breathe out loud through your mouth for nine.”

Closing his eyes, he followed the instruction and immediately you could see him relax.

“Keep breathing mate, keep breathing.” After six minutes, Michael opened his eyes, smiled, shook his head and lifted his body back onto dry ground.

The next day he did 10 minutes and has been in that bath every day this week.

Overcoming your blocks and fears can often be extremely difficult.

Michael’s ice bath challenge reminded me that most trials can be overcome by first choosing to have a crack and — with the encouragement, guidance and support of others — nothing is impossible.