How far can I recline my seat on a plane and who gets the arm rests? An etiquette expert settles the debate
They’re the age old questions that haunt plane passengers everywhere.
Who gets the arm rest? How far back can I recline my chair? Is that person pushing in?
For as long as people have been forced to squeeze into economy class, they’ve been griping about the people with whom they’ve been forced to sit.
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By continuing you agree to our Terms and Privacy Policy.But etiquette expert Jo Hayes told The Nightly there are a number of different ways to navigate these tricky situations.
Who gets the arm rest on a plane?
“This is one of those grey areas of life that you figure out/negotiate in the moment,” Hayes said.
“A good rule to remember is to consider these ‘elbow rests’, not ‘arm rests’, and share them.
“Each person can slightly rest their elbow on the rest, one further back, one further forward, and it normally works out.”
She said as with all things in life, the ‘Golden Rule’ applied — do unto others as you would.
“That means not hogging the arm rest, (but) being charitable and courteous and non-verbally agreeing to share,” she said.
What do you do if someone is hogging the arm rest?
You know the types — those passengers that sit down, spread out, and rub shoulders with you for the entire journey.
But Hayes says there is a simple way to deal with them.
“If someone is clearly hogging the armrest and you’d like to have some space to rest your elbow, some subtle body movement and movement of the elbow — slightly nudging their arm on the armrest — can be enough to cue the other person into moving slightly to give you some room,” she said.
“If the subtle non-verbals aren’t enough, don’t be afraid to politely request some room. It may feel awkward, but you’re not requesting the entire arm rest — just some room for your elbow.”
Hayes says it is important to remember that the person sitting in the middle seat has drawn the shortest straw.
“Those on either end of a three seat row have at least one armrest to themselves,” she said.
“The person in the middle should at least be able to share the rest as an elbow rest — if not have the armrest to themselves.
“Again, it’s one of those situations that you figure out in the moment.”
Is it rude to recline your seat on a plane?
The verdict is in — it’s okay to push your seat back on a plane.
You just need to be polite about it.
“One does well to recline one’s seat in a courteous manner,” Hayes said.
“Snapping it back without any notice, or apology, can feel or be rude to the person behind.
“And if they have a drink on their tray, or their laptop open, an abrupt snap back can tip over the drink, or cause the tray/laptop to jut into their stomach.
“I encourage people to, where possible, turn around briefly to the person behind, offer an apologetic smile and indication that you’re about to recline your seat.
“Then proceed to recline in a gentle manner — no abrupt snap backs.”
How many times can I get up from my seat to use the toilet?
Once again, according to Hayes, the Golden Rule applies here — and that means minimising getting up for toilet breaks where possible, especially if you’re on a window or middle seat.
“Toilet breaks are, of course, often unavoidable,” she said.
“But if needing to access things from the overhead compartment, endeavour to do so prior to takeoff, or when already up for a toilet break, rather than adding another disruption to one’s seat neighbours, to get up an additional time.”
Can I disembark the plane before the passengers in front of me?
Basically, the answer is no.
“The general rule of disembarkation is one row at a time, from the front to the back,” Hayes said.
“Good manners dictate not jumping the queue. Give those ahead of you time and space to get out of their seat, access their overhead luggage, and move out.
“Be gracious and polite, smile, don’t behave in a frustrated or exasperated way — even if you feel it.
“It adds pressure to others when those in rows behind crowd in too close or behave like a bull at a gate.
“Again, do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”
