Wine Chats: Are you a good partner in the bedroom?

Billi Milovanovic & Lyndsey Kirkwood
The Nightly
3 Min Read
In this week’s The Nightly edition of Wine Chats Podcast, we cheers to being perfect — and our husband’s not being perfect — in bed. Not like that. That’s a different episode.

If you’ve ever had to share a bed, you know that bedroom etiquette is as important as it gets - turns out, our husbands have none!

In this week’s The Nightly edition of Wine Chats Podcast, we cheers to being perfect - and our husband’s not being perfect - in bed. Not like that. That’s a different episode.

As we settle into a fine glass of The Hidden Sea Pinot Grigio, we ponder what makes a good partner in the bedroom?

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Getting handsy

Bildo: Tell me what Cameron does that annoys you.

Lindalin: When I am tired and I want to go to bed, I’m ready to go to sleep. Don’t touch me. Let me just sleep. I cannot stand when I’m getting into bed trying to get comfy. You got to find your spot, put your cushion the right way, lay your head down the right way. And he just comes straight on in. Not necessarily for sexual, sexy time. But even spooning and lovey-dovey. I know it makes me sound like a cold, hard....

Bildo: It does a little bit. Is your husband not allowed to touch you?

Lindalin: Let me get comfortable. I haven’t even laid down properly.

Bildo: Okay, I’m going to one up you on that one because you actually stole the thing that I was going to say. But mine’s worse. This is what annoys me - when I get into bed and I’ve been there for hours, because I get into bed around eight o’clock, give or take, I have a giant TV in my room, and I like to just lie there and watch whatever show I’ve got on at the time. Then when that’s all done, I like to nest, get into my little position, and then I like to go to sleep, right? This is the moment. When I start nesting, this is the moment when Henry decides that that is his time to get handsy on me. I’ve just been laying there for literally two hours, and you haven’t laid a finger on me. I don’t know why he waits for that moment when I go to sleep. Now is the time? No.

Is eating in bed bad etiquette?

Lindalin: Oh, question time.

Bildo: Yes, I mean, I only have the one. Do you eat in bed?

Lindalin: Like at night time? But see, we don’t watch TV in bed. I don’t have a TV in my bedroom.

Bildo: Oh, my God. I snack in my bed all the time, and then I leave chocolate smears all over my bed. Sometimes I’ll find seeds and things. In terms of bed etiquette, that’s probably my worst thing.

Lindalin: Could you have not said chocolate smears?

Bildo: Well, that’s what it is. It ends up being like... Sometimes I have to lick it off my sheets just so I don’t have to, because otherwise it’s like a big chunk of chocolate. So I might as well bite it off.

Lindalin: Oh my God, we are done. Don’t sleep in Billi’s bed because her sheets will be disgusting.

Maybe we’re not so perfect

Now that Lindalin is grossed out by Bildo’s bedroom confession, we wrap this episode up with some sound advice that promises to make you the perfect bedroom partner - do not get handsy as your other half is getting into bed, or nesting for sleep and definitely don’t sleep in Bildo’s bed because her sheets will be disgusting.

Thanks for tuning in for another great week here on The Nightly and until next Friday, chat soon!

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