Santa Sabina College apologises to parents of Charlotte O’Brien: ‘We are sincerely sorry’

The principal of a Sydney school under intense scrutiny following the death of 12-year-old student Charlotte O’Brien has now formally apologised to her parents.

Charlotte died by suicide on September 9 after allegedly suffering years of torment and harassment at Santa Sabina College in Strathfield and on social media.

Her parents Mat and Kelly have been vocal regarding their frustrations at the school’s lack of action prior to their daughter’s death, as well as the school’s disappointing response after the story went public.

The school was also slammed for removing a memorial honouring Charlotte.

Principal Paulina Skerman told 7NEWS.com.au the memorial was removed according to advice from Headspace, however when asked by 2GB’s Ben Fordham, Headspace denied giving such advice.

Skerman later said she had been referring to previous advice about a memorial.

On Monday the school sent a letter to its community addressing the confusion over the memorial and formally apologising to the family for its past actions.

It said its initial statements to the media — which included challenging claims from Kelly that she had begged the school to take action before her daughter’s death — “were inadequate and hurtful”.

“We apologise to Charlotte’s family for this. It was never our intention to add to their pain,” the school said.

“In these complex and traumatic circumstances, the college has worked closely with a range of experts, including mental health professionals.

“We acknowledge that, at times, our efforts have fallen short and we are sincerely sorry.”

The school said its decision to remove Charlotte’s memorial was “difficult” and done to mitigate further distress for students.

It said it was committed to creating a permanent memorial to remember Charlotte.

According to Fordham, Skerman sat down with Mat and Kelly at their home on Friday with flowers and apologised for everything that had transpired before and after their daughter’s death.

In the letter to the Santa Sabina College community the school said Skerman was “grateful” she had the chance to meet with them.

“(Charlotte) will not be forgotten,” the school said.

“Our teachers and staff continue to prioritise student relationships and wellbeing, working closely together to find ways to better support our students.

“We are fully committed to addressing issues and challenges to create a safe and nurturing environment for our young people.”

‘I felt my daughter’s life did not matter’

Mat had previously told Ben Fordham’s 2GB program it had taken the couple weeks to organise a meeting with the school’s principal.

“That glimmer of hope that anything positive to come from that meeting was squashed the moment we arrived,” he said.

Mat explained how “incredibly hard” it was to walk through the school gates full of young girls their daughter’s age.

“We had to navigate ourselves across the school grounds, surrounded by other girls in their school uniform, knowing that we will never see our daughter again. That was incredibly hard for us,” he said.

“We arrived there and met with the principal. When I shared the feedback, she wasn’t interested in receiving that. The feedback was interrupted. It was discounted. It was disagreed with.

“I sat across the room from a lady (the principal) that showed myself and the rest of the family no emotion or empathy at all.”

Mat added the principal did not offer any kind of apology for what happened to their daughter, and said “there was no accountability at all”.

“The questions we wanted answered were simply not answered at all,” he said.

“We were left to show ourselves out of the school grounds.”

“The last image that I will have of that school was as I looked behind me, Kelly was carrying some items of Charlotte’s and watching her squeeze herself and that box through those closed gates was one of the hardest things that I’ve seen.

“Kelly got in the car and that was the worst I had seen her since the funeral. She said to me ‘I felt my daughter’s life did not matter’.

Charlotte’s parents had previously said they raised bullying concerns multiple times with the school and although the school investigated, no further action was taken.

“One day she just burst into tears and she said ‘everybody hates me. I’m a monster. I’ve got no friends. They’re so mean to me’,” Kelly told 2GB.

In a note before her death, Charlotte called out the bullying she had received at the school and asked her parents to tell the school, Kelly said.

The grieving mother made public the heartbreaking email she sent the school following Charlotte’s death.

“I was scared to label it bullying but that’s exactly what it was,” she said.

“I begged the school to intervene with these girls and now she is gone forever.”

If you need help in a crisis, call Lifeline on 13 11 14. For further information about depression contact beyondblue on 1300224636 or talk to your GP, local health professional or someone you trust.