WINE CHATS: What to do and what not to do on a playdate

Billi Milovanovic and Lyndsey Kirkwood
The Nightly
Have you ever charged a parent to host their child on a playdate? This week on The Nightly edition of Wine Chats, join Billi and Lyndsey as they dive into the topic of playdates and sleepovers and the proper way to host them.

Have you ever charged a parent to host their child on a playdate? Didn’t think so!

This week on The Nightly edition of Wine Chats, before we can do anything, we crack open a bottle of The Hidden Sea GSM. Once we establish what GSM actually stands for, we dive into the topic of playdates and sleepovers and the proper way to host them. Let’s start with rule #1 - don’t ask for money.

“I’m here at McDonalds…”

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Lyndsey: So I came across this on either TikTok or Instagram. So it was a totally legit story about this mom — this is why I wanted to talk about it — her daughter was on a playdate, right? And the mum of the kid hosting takes the kids to McDonald’s. She then rings the mum of the child that she’s looking after and says, “Oh, I’m here at McDonald’s. We’re going to buy some fries. Can you transfer me some money?”

Billi: Why didn’t I think to do that to you the other day?! I literally had Lyndsay’s daughter over for a whole day. I just love having her over. And I took her to McDonald’s and now I realise it’s totally okay to ask parents to pay for their own children.

Lyndsey: It’s not okay. It is not. I’m sorry. Fine when you’re planning the play date, say, at an amusement park. Can you give me 20 bucks for lunch or can you pay the admission, whatever. Things like that. But if you have a kid over and you decide to take the kids to McDonald’s or to wherever…

Billi: Nope. That’s your decision. Otherwise just feed them something at home. You have to cater for them.

Lyndsey: If I received that message, I’d be like, I am coming to just pick up my daughter. Because this is ridiculous. Now that we have children, you know, mine are 10, eight, and six. Yours are eight and six. They’re in the prime playdate era of their lives. It’s an unwritten rule, you don’t need to pack snacks.

Billi: When Ada came over the other day, she brought snacks. I thought that was very nice.

Lyndsey: I always chuck in a bag of chips or a box of crackers, just something little, but I don’t pack like a whole bag of food. Not necessary. Because you are sending them to someone’s house and an adult is going to be looking after them and feeding them. Bain has had friends sleep over, and that’s a whole 24, 30 hours, whatever. I would never expect the parents to pay for the dinner or contribute anything.

Billi: Totally. I just want to say, maybe this person didn’t have a lot of money to begin with. But then don’t take them to McDonald’s.

Lyndsey: I just, it’s very bizarre to me that anybody would do such a thing.

Sleepover time!

Billi: Sleepovers. How do you feel about them? Let’s bring it back to TikTok. I’ve seen so many videos of people who are like, “I’m never letting my children have sleepovers.” Especially with people who you’re not mega, mega close with, you know what I mean?

Lyndsey: Oh, totally.

Billi: What are the boundaries of who is allowed, and who they’re allowed to sleep over with.

Lyndsey: What are the criteria? Well, I have to know their parents. And I’ve had to meet them. Like Bain’s only slept over at his really good friend’s places. So I know the parents. And he’s old enough now, I guess if something weird happens, he’ll tell me. Vann’s never been on a sleepover, he’s only six. Ada, she’s only slept over at your place. And maybe two, three, maybe, of her closest friends. Again, I know their parents. If she were to come home and say, Oh mom, I want to go to Bobby Joe’s house for a sleepover. I’d be like, who’s Bobby Joe? And what do her parents do? Where do they live?

Billi: I think Eve’s only ever slept over with family and with you. I don’t think she’s really gone anywhere else, but I do agree with the whole idea of not sending your kids to random people’s houses.

Lyndsey: No, but who would?

Billi: Lots of people!

Lyndsey: Who would ring you up and say, “That’s just three bucks for their fries.”

Billi: Imagine how much they’d charge you for a whole night. That kind of scares me when they start getting a bit older. Cause at the moment they’re still so little and they don’t really want to go anywhere. But when they’re teenagers you don’t know what’s going to happen on the other side. 14, 15 years old, those are the ages that they’re going to be doing naughty things.

Lyndsey: I’ll have an interrogation interview with the parents first.

Billi: That’s the thing because I’m super friendly, love people, but I will also hide in my car during pickup so I don’t have to talk to anybody. I’m going to have to meet all these new high school people. I feel like I’m just going to be that parent who’s not going to allow sleepovers because I just can’t be bothered meeting the parents. I don’t know who these weirdos are. I don’t want to send my kids to some strange person’s house.

Lyndsey: But that’s why you meet them. And then they’re not strangers.

Billi: And here we are back again, because I don’t want to meet them. Full circle.

It’s easy, just keep your kids locked away

Maybe this isn’t the best advice we’ve given, so don’t be like Billi who refuses to be friendly with parents and who would prefer to lock her kids in a basement where they’ll be nice and safe. Don’t worry, she’d provide food and water, perhaps the occasional sunshine.

We can all agree that that took a weird turn so time to wrap it up for another week here at The Nightly. We hope you have a wonderful weekend full of playdates with people you know and make sure you come back next Friday for a brand new episode of Wine Chats!

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